Home, Sweet Home: Episode I

There it is: my house. Can you see it there, off to the right, all alone at the end of the road? And beyond, hills full of cows and trees, and then the border with Bern (the canton, not the city). Okay, I'll admit it. I did sort of set up the composition of this photo so it would look like we have no neighbors. We do have neighbors, but they don't exactly live next to us. Plus I have never met them. Anyway, there is it, the home of my first host family. I have been told that it originally was split into two living areas and housed two families: my host family and another one. One of my host sisters pointed out one of the previous occupants while we were on the bus. And I guess that sometime in the last several years, the house came to belong to my host family and they did some renovations. I think rooms might have been added, or some walls might have been taken out to create a bigger space downstairs. I thought you all would enjoy hearing about the place where I live. Instead of showing you photos (other than this one), I am just going to describe it. This is for a couple of different reasons. First, I have never taken any photos of the house. Second, I probably won't take any. It's not that photo-worthy. But this will be a fun description exercise for me. You guessed it, I am using my blog to try to keep my English up to par. I am going to have to use it next year, you know. I've heard that in college you have to write these things called papers.

Let's begin with the outside. As you can see, once the road passes our nearest neighbor's house, it turns into a gravel road, which narrows and turns into a gravel path which leads downhill into some woods and is actually part of the Swiss hiking trail system, which is extensive. Before the path goes downhill, there are some concrete stairs on the side of the house which lead to the front door. Yes, the front door is the one facing completely away from the street. I don't understand it either. Near the stairs is a giant woodpile covered with a blue tarp, which I assume will be used to heat the house in the coming winter months. Actually, let's just call them the winter months, since they have already arrived. Other items of interest on the outside of the house: the beehives that my host dad cares for, some random junk in a random shed, another random shed with bicycles and things like that in it, a big red collapsible clothes drying rack, the table we ate at when it was still warm outside, a red Peugeot, and a silver Honda. Yes, we have no garage. Song reference, anyone?

Let's move to the interior. The bottom floor consists of a mud room, my host parents' bedroom and bathroom, and the kitchen/dining/living room area. The mud room can be found right inside the "front" back door. Seriously, why is the door there? It still bothers me. So, the room: lots and lots of dirty shoes are either drying out on the floor or on the rack thing or in the closet thing. Also, there is a hanging fabric sort of round shelf deal with lots of winter accessories in it, like gloves and hats and mittens and scarves. This room is below the level of the rest of the bottom floor, so there are a few steps up to the hallway. Between the mud room and the hallway is a sliding wooden door and a chair. The door is usually left partially open to allow the three cats to come and go as they please through the kitty door that is in the "front" back door. I have always assumed the chair was there to allow the sliding door to be partially open without letting the dog into the mud room. Also, to dump stuff on.

As you stand in this hallway, the door to my host parents' room is on the left and the door to their bathroom is on the right. I'll skip the description for these areas since I don't go in there. Which brings us to the last room on this floor, which is really three rooms in one. The only division between the rooms is a sort of square pillar thing that's approximately in the middle. Next to it is a piece of furniture with the radio on top of it. This radio usually plays news in Swiss German, which I can't understand very well when it's radio quality, or traditional Swiss music like yodeling, accordions, or Lady Gaga. Preferably all in a row. But seriously, the radio music is weird here. Once I heard five songs in a row, the first of which was in French, the second of which was in Italian, the third of which was in English, the fourth of which was in German, and the fifth of which was an instrumental version of the Swiss national anthem. Also, part of the square pillar wall thing is a pull-out pantry area with several shelves that hold ingredients of all sorts. The only things I usually take from the pantry are the cereal, the chocolate powder, and the cereal bars. The honey also stays in there, along with some boxes of Swiss cake mix and bread mix and such that don't ever seem to be used. Also, there is Grillsauce, which is a universal sauce that my host sister likes to eat with meat. And Kätzchenmilch (Kitten milk), which appears to some sort of powder resembling fish food that, when mixed with water, produces something to be fed to kittens. At least this is what I am guessing from looking at the label, which has a picture of kittens on it. I'm not sure what this is doing here. I assume it's safe for human consumption, because my host mom sprinkled it on her food once. I don't think I'll try it though, as open-minded about food as I generally am. I try to stick to human food most of the time.

So here we are, listening to the radio and standing in the kitchen. It's basically a regular old kitchen. There's a window above the kitchen sink, a refrigerator which never seems to be all that cold, a stove / oven combo, some counters, and some drawers. The main thing that can be found in the drawers is Tupperware. Other things that can be found in the drawers are utensils for eating and cooking, dry pasta, spices, saucepans, frying pans, and plates. But in all seriousness, there are 2.5 huge drawers dedicated entirely to Tupperware. Even most of the cooking utensils are plastic and probably come from Tupperware as well. And if there's anything we're missing, no worries! Just throw a Tupperware party and order away! Yes, I once came home from orchestra at 11 pm or so and walked into the end of a Tupperware party. Everyone was sitting around the table, drinking coffee and ordering Tupperware. Apparently this is the only way to buy the stuff in Switzerland.

Another important thing about the kitchen is the fruit bowl. It sits on the counter farthest from the mud room end of the house (the counters form a U-shape). The best kind of fruit to grace the fruit bowl is the Clementine. Once the host fam figured out I like these, there have almost always been Clementines in the fruit bowl, for which I am eternally grateful. Clementines are probably among my top three favorite fruits, along with raspberries and perhaps fresh peaches. Dried apricots are pretty good, too.

On the other side of the fruit bowl counter is the table. It's in the corner of the house, and along the two walls next to it are continuous benches forming an L-shape. Along the other two sides of the table are a few chairs. Right now there is a blue tablecloth. Also, there is a perpetual stack of papers on the end of the table that is closer to the kitchen. This consists mostly of mail but also of newspapers and flyers and things. Sometimes I look through it and find my bank statements and such.

The other part of the bottom floor is the living room area, which consists of two sofas covered in blue fabric, which is covered in cat and dog hair. The cats like to sit on the sofas and the dog often sleeps there. The sofas form an L-shape towards the TV, which is next to the "patio" real door. This door is also not facing the street but opens onto the area with the cars and beehives and other table, which is why it feels like the front door to me. It's only a sliding glass door, though, and has no keyhole, so it's not as official-looking as the other one. My host family has interesting TV habits. They mainly keep the TV on the same channel, and they watch three main types of shows, as far I as can tell: American crime shows dubbed into German, soap operas from Germany, and news. Half of the news shows they watch are celebrity news, which is even worse than local news. And Switzerland is so small that even national news is sort of like local news, at least from the point of view of an American. So, needless to say, I rarely watch TV with them. Oh, and I forgot to say that in front of the couch facing the TV is a coffee table with sudoku books on it. My host mom is obsessed with sudoku.

So I just looked back and realized that this post is getting really long. I think that I'm going to stop it here and write about the top floor later. I hope you didn't mind the length. Although I guess that if you're still reading, then you probably didn't and the apology will be lost on those who found it too long and stopped somewhere in the middle. Now I've got two loose ends to tie up: this and the turkey thing. Let's see how many loose ends I can create before the end of the year. Then I could do a big "season finale" blog post and tie them all up and everyone would feel so satisfied. That could get confusing, though. We'll see.